An Engagement at Pemberley Read online

  “I think Mr Darcy is the one who is too nice if he is in such demand everywhere he goes and yet wants no one,” said Elizabeth with a quick smile. “Your daughter has no cause to envy me, Mrs Kennedy. If there are none who please him, I doubt I will be any different.”

  “And he expressed no desire to see you again? He will not come here to visit?”

  “He said nothing of the sort. As my uncle said, he merely wished to show his gratitude for my assistance. Now that duty is discharged, I do not believe he will trouble me again.”

  “Sophia will be pleased to hear that. Not that she needs to throw herself at a man like Mr Darcy, to be sure. She has her pick of men in Derbyshire. But I suppose all young ladies are drawn to a man who is handsome and yet so distant. It arouses their romantic sensations and makes them believe they might be the one to inspire his passion.”

  “I cannot argue with you that there are ladies like that,” said Elizabeth with a smile. “My youngest sisters are precisely that way. But I cannot say I see the attraction. I would much prefer a man who I like just as he is rather than one who appears to offer nothing but hard work in order to make him a decent partner. Give me a man I can laugh and talk with easily.”

  Mrs Kennedy sighed and glanced at her neighbour. Mrs Logan sighed and shook her head.

  “Then Mr Darcy will not tempt you. Oh, I hear he is decent enough. His staff and tenants all like him. But he is rather aloof. He has lived here all his life and yet none of us know him very well. Many of us have sent him invitations inviting him to dine with us or attend balls or soirees but he always sends his apologies. I suppose that is the way of these fine, rich men.”

  “Perhaps Mr Darcy has much to do with the running of his estate,” said Mrs Gardiner. “He is very young to already be in command of his inheritance. Most men his age would not anticipate it for another twenty or thirty years and he has had his for five years already. And he has the raising of his sister to consider. He is not like other young men who can afford to think of nothing but pleasure and pursuits.”

  Elizabeth pulled a face. “I cannot be satisfied by that. I am sure Mr Darcy is not the only young man in his situation. He has had five years as master and in that time, he has not even found one evening to grace the town with his presence? No, I cannot accept that. No one is so busy that they cannot afford to be sociable for a few evenings a year. I think Mr Darcy is just too proud and above himself. He thinks too much of his own importance to visit with the neighbourhood.”

  “Poor Mr Darcy,” said Mrs Gardiner, exchanging a laughing look with her husband. “You are determined to dislike him.”

  “I prefer to think of it as that I am seeing him for who he is,” said Elizabeth with a grin. “Besides, what does it matter what I think of him? I am sure he does not care in the slightest. And we shall not see him again. I am under no obligation to find him pleasing.”

  Mrs Kennedy beamed. “My daughters will be thrilled.”

  “Are you sure you would rather not come with us?” Mrs Gardiner asked again. Elizabeth sat on the end of her bed watching as her aunt fixed her bonnet and tucked her curls underneath.

  “Very sure. You have not seen your friends for years and I already had the opportunity to meet them last week. I know how much you must have to catch up on together. I will be much happier exploring by myself. Do not spare a thought for me.”

  Mrs Gardiner glanced at her niece through her reflection in the mirror. She bit her lip. “If you are completely sure…” Her face made it clear how much the idea of having time alone with her friend appealed to her.

  Elizabeth smiled. “I am very sure. Do I really need to convince you that having a few hours alone to explore rocks and mountains is not a hardship for me? Will you think I am to be pitied when I find a large tree to sit under and enjoy a book?”

  Her aunt laughed. “When you put it like that, I am persuaded. But do take care of yourself, my dear. We could never face your father if you slipped and took a fall.”

  “I shall be as careful as I always am. Now, go. Your friends will be waiting for you.”

  Elizabeth gently turned her aunt around and playfully pushed her towards the door. After she was gone, she turned back to the room with a smile. A whole day stretched before her to walk and read. What could be better?

  14

  Elizabeth was convinced there could be few places in the world more beautiful than Derbyshire. The wild, rocky peaks stirred something in her, a restlessness her mama had always despaired of. Elizabeth smiled as she recalled how adamant she had been that this journey was a chance for her to forget about the pressures of finding a husband for a while. If she could find a good, kind man she could love who also lived in Derbyshire, perhaps that would not be such a dreadful fate. She might do better to look about her more and consider whether anyone might be a suitable candidate. That young lawyer from Lambton she had met at her aunt’s friend’s house several nights ago had been charming and clever and easy to converse with…

  Elizabeth caught her line of thinking and laughed. Her mother would swell with joy if she thought Elizabeth was finally giving serious thought to getting married. And of course she was not about to lock a man down just so she might remain in Derbyshire.

  But much as she loved her own company, Elizabeth felt a pang when she realised she spent most of her time rambling alone. Her aunt and uncle were excellent companions but her aunt tired easily and they could not explore as much as Elizabeth wished to. Her sisters had little interest in anything beyond their own concerns and her particular friend, Charlotte Lucas, did not see the joy in walking through woods or mountains. Just once, it would be nice to have a companion who enjoyed it as much as she did. How pleasant it would be to witness a stunning sight and have someone to share it with. Elizabeth could not help thinking how much more enjoyable it would be to sit beneath a tree reading a book with a companion by her side, both engrossed in their own affairs but both relishing in the closeness of the other. How strange that her solitary walks were no longer giving her as much pleasure as they used to do.

  As Elizabeth carefully made her way down a slope of steep rocks, a sound caught her attention. She paused to listen. Voices carried over towards her. A man and a woman’s, she was sure. Would they pass her by without seeing her or were they about to come upon her? Elizabeth picked her way down the stones, only for the smaller ones to give way and take her feet from under her. With a cry, she slipped the last few feet before crashing into something warm and hard. Elizabeth barely had time to think that she was safe before she was aware that something held her as much as she held it. She lifted her head and found herself staring directly into Mr Darcy’s eyes.

  Elizabeth gasped and scrambled back away from him, loosening his grip.

  “What are you doing here?” she asked in confusion.

  Darcy’s lips twitched.

  “I live here, Miss Bennet. I thought you knew that.”

  “No, I meant…” She took a deep breath. “Thank you for stopping my fall. The stones were looser than I realised.”

  “Yes, they are. You should be more careful where you tread. You do not always know the safest places to walk.”

  Elizabeth bristled a little at his condescending tone and was about to make a retort when she realised he was not alone.

  “Ah, Miss Darcy. Forgive me, I did not see you there. I hope you are well?”

  “I am very well,” said Georgiana with her shy smile. “I hope you did not hurt yourself?”

  “Not at all. Your brother was good enough to catch me.” Elizabeth recalled how they had stood with their arms around one another and flushed. For a brief moment after she had realised Darcy was holding her, she had relished his touch and was almost reluctant to step away. It was the shock of understanding that more than anything else that had made her jump clear of him. That was what came of self pity. She had just been pondering on her new loneliness and it had caused her to press herself to a man she did not even like.

  “
You are alone?” Darcy asked with a frown.

  “I am. I like to walk alone.”

  “I am surprised your aunt and uncle allowed you.”

  Elizabeth raised her chin at the implied insult.

  “My aunt and uncle know me very well and trust me completely. They know how much I enjoy walking alone.”

  Darcy hesitated then smiled. “Forgive me. I meant it as no slight towards your aunt and uncle. They are excellent people. We were honoured to have them last night, were we not, Georgiana?”

  Georgiana nodded in agreement.

  “Where do you plan to continue with your walk?” Darcy asked.

  “I am not sure.” Elizabeth shrugged. “I thought I might walk on a little further in that direction and see where it took me.”

  “Ah.” Darcy looked in the direction she gestured towards. “Well, I understand you say you wished to walk alone. An impulse I often share. But if you would like company and a guide, my sister and I are walking to the waterfall, if you would like to join us? Have you seen it yet?”

  “I have not.” Elizabeth tried not to sound too eager. “I heard some of the others at the inn mention it but I did not realise it was so close.”

  “Then you will join us?”

  “I…” Elizabeth glanced at the direction she had planned to walk with reluctance. As she did, she caught Georgiana’s eye. The young girl looked at her so hopefully that Elizabeth found she could not refuse her. She relented with a smile.

  “Very well. I will accompany you.”

  She was rewarded to see Georgiana’s face light up into a brilliant smile.

  “I am glad you are coming with us,” said Georgiana as they walked through a wooded area, Darcy taking the lead. “We come here every year when I am home. It is one of the most beautiful places in the world. Not that I have seen much of the world, but I am quite convinced about this. I hope you love it as much as we do, Miss Bennet.”

  “I am sure I will,” said Elizabeth, smiling at Georgiana’s enthusiasm. “I love nature and I find it hard to be displeased by anything I have seen of Derbyshire so far. Is it a long walk?”

  Georgiana hesitated. “It is a little long. I hope you do not mind?”

  “Not at all. That is just what I prefer.”

  “You walk much at home then, Miss Bennet?” Darcy called over his shoulder.

  “As much as I can. There are woods around Meryton and a fine peak called Oakham Mount. I suppose you should laugh to see it considering what you have around you, but I am fond of it. When it is clear enough, I fancy I can see all the way to London.”

  “And do you always walk alone?”

  “Most of the time. None of my friends are as fond of walking as I am.”

  “That is a shame. Perhaps you should get a dog of your own to accompany you.” He glanced back at Elizabeth, his expression so innocent she could not tell if he was teasing her. She decided to test the waters and see.

  “I thought I had found a dog of my own recently. Alas, he was already claimed by another.”

  “How dreadful. You should have fought for him.”

  “I would have done but the owner is a peculiar fellow and I did not like to cross him. He is rather an odd mix of reserve and humour.”

  “He sounds delightful.”

  “He certainly seems to think so.”

  Darcy grinned down at her. Somehow, they had fallen in step beside one another and Elizabeth was not sure how it had happened.

  “And what do you think?”

  “I think he promised he would be my guide and yet he has not yet told me anything about the surrounding area. Is he not a cad? How can such a man be trusted?”

  Darcy laughed, an oddly carefree sound. Elizabeth was sure she would never make him out.

  “Very well. All the land around here was the original place where my ancestor founded his estate. We have been here for several centuries. At least six.”

  “That is astonishing. You do not look a day over five hundred.”

  “Thank you, Miss Bennet. You may credit the fresh air for that.”

  Elizabeth smiled up at him. “And why is this waterfall such a favourite with you and Miss Darcy? Is it merely because it is a pretty place or does it hold a deeper meaning for you both?”

  “You are rather astute, Miss Bennet.” Darcy jumped up onto a higher track and held his arm out to Elizabeth. Elizabeth hesitated before taking it. Something within her jumped at the contact. To cover her confusion, she glanced behind for Georgiana. She saw the younger girl crouched down on the path below. She looked up and waved her hand at Elizabeth.

  “You go on ahead,” she said. “I need to fix the lace of my boot.”

  “We can wait for you,” said Elizabeth. “I am sure you will need help over some of the ground.”

  “Not at all.” Georgiana shook her head firmly. “I know the area like the back of my hand. Besides, I will enjoy the solitude as I catch up with you. Please, do not wait on me.”

  Elizabeth turned back to Darcy to see what he made of that. He was frowning at his young sister though there was a slight humorous twist to his mouth.

  “Is it alright to leave her alone to catch up? I do not like it,” said Elizabeth.

  Darcy turned his attention to her, his eyebrow raised. “You do not like to think of a young lady walking alone in her own home? What am I to make of such inconsistency?”

  Elizabeth flushed. Try as she might, she could think of no response to that.

  “If you are sure Miss Darcy will be well…”

  “I am quite sure. Besides, we will not race. We will not be so far ahead of her that she cannot call to us at any moment that she wants.”

  Elizabeth cast one last look back at Georgiana and then nodded. As Darcy prepared to move, she realised with a start that he still held her hand in his. She jumped and pulled them apart, trying to look as though she was not conscious of her actions. Darcy did not say anything.

  15

  “You asked about whether this place had special meaning to Georgiana and I,” he said after some silence. “It does. Our mother and father used to bring us here when we were young. Georgiana is much younger than me but we still have lots of shared memories of coming here with our parents who watched over us while we played. They loved it here as well. In fact, my father arranged a party here when he courted my mother. It was here that he asked her to marry him.”

  “Ah.” Elizabeth smiled. “Then I can see why it is so special to you both. You must miss it when you are away from home.”

  “Very much so. But then, we miss Pemberley itself.”

  “And do you not consider making it your permanent home? I am sure you are under no obligation to always be elsewhere.”

  Darcy did not answer at first. He swung his cane at some undergrowth. “No, I am not. But Georgiana likes to be in London where her masters are, and I like to travel to be with friends. I spend much of my time with my close friend, Charles Bingley. He is much more gregarious than I. I like to be around him.”

  “But if it means you miss your home…”

  Darcy smiled down at her. “Perhaps you cannot understand it. You have your parents and sisters. Your aunt and uncle are clearly very attached to you. Perhaps always being in the middle of a close and loving family, you do not know what it means to be lonely. Since our parents died, Pemberley feels very empty. It is hard to be in a place that once rang with laughter, where every room reminds you of faces that you lost. If I had a family of my own, perhaps…”

  Elizabeth tensed at that and looked straight ahead. Darcy also fell silent. It was rather an indiscreet conversation to have, but here in these beautiful woods, far away from other people, it felt too easy to open up to one another in ways it would otherwise be frowned upon.

  “I would not be so quick to think I would not understand you,” said Elizabeth softly. “As you know, I walk alone, in part because I enjoy my own company but also because I do not have a choice. I am close to my older sister, but we do not
have much in common. I am also close to my father but he prefers his own company and thinks it a punishment to be around others. My aunt and uncle are wonderful, but they live in London and we only see one another on occasion. And of course they are first with one another as they should be.”

  “And your other sisters? Your mother?”

  Elizabeth smiled wryly. “I am afraid I do not have much at all in common with them. My mother and I rarely see eye to eye and my younger sisters are too silly though they might develop sense as they grow older. Do not think I seek your pity when you have lost your parents. I only mean I am not a stranger to feeling lonely. And I can see how strange it would be to stay at Longbourn if my family were gone.”

  “I am sorry to hear that you feel that way,” said Darcy in a quiet voice. “Have you many friends? I cannot imagine someone as easy and engaging as you would not have many.”

  “I have a particular friend. Charlotte Lucas. We talk a great deal, but again, we do not always have much in common.” Elizabeth released a frustrated sigh. “I should not complain. I do not even know what I am trying to say. I was thinking on this matter before you and Miss Darcy came along. I think my real problem is that I do not feel as though I have a kindred soul. Someone I can open up to and confide in. Someone who understands what I mean. But perhaps I am complaining of nothing. I am sure most people feel that way but never find it and they learn to muddle along well enough.”

  “It is a shame though I think. That people must learn to muddle along. How rare it is that we find someone who understands us. Who can be our partner in all things.”

  “I think you must know something of that pressure,” said Elizabeth. Her mind drifted back to Mrs Kennedy and her excitement at thinking Darcy was free for her daughter.

  Darcy laughed out loud. “I do indeed. Most men in my situation are well aware of the pressures and responsibilities we have. We are also aware that there are those among us who seek us for their own gain. It makes it difficult to trust people’s motivations.” He paused as they neared the edge of the trees. He smiled down at Elizabeth. “Do you not hear it?”